ENOUGH not BETTER

Kelley recently sent me an Instagram post about the false promises of the self-optimization movement and our cultural fixation on self-improvement and wellness for the sake of productivity and maximization. This opened up a really helpful conversation for us about how Upstream could easily slide into that category if we aren’t mindful. Good catch, Kelley!

The post was about how the sleep industry has capitalized on this need for “productive” sleep and our tendency to obsess over how we can sleep better and thus live better and more productive lives. (Sidenote: I was actually fairly interested in supporting this industry as a postpartum mom desperate for a few hours of consolidated sleep at the time Kelley’s message came through! Thankfully we are sleeping again!) But we know this kind of focus, while maybe initially helpful (afterall, sleep really is important!), begins to feel oppressive and isolating as it becomes a heavy burden to constantly feel like we need to do more or have better gadgets and strategies in order to live better lives and be better parents! BETTER, BETTER, BETTER!

We do not want Upstream to be about “better.” Instead, our desire is that Upstream would be an experience of “enough.” We want to be clear from the start that while Upstream will include a focus on growth, change and healing—our hope is that you do not walk away feeling like a machine that we just “tuned up” so it can keep on humming. Our hope is that you will walk away feeling seen, known, connected to other women, and at rest.

As we learn about toxic stress patterns in our families and explore ways to decrease stress and increase regulation, we firmly believe that Upstream is not about creating a lifestyle of ease (in our beautiful athleisure-wear). Rather, it is about creating toolkits to regulate ourselves and co-regulate with our kids, so that we can engage with our children and our world in a joyful, connected and present way.  So that we can return to the “hard” that we find in our lives, with new ways to sustain ourselves and care for our families. We don’t believe that it’s about getting rid of the hard or the heavy, but about finding grace through relationships that heal. 

Here’s to a good night’s sleep, yes, but also to grace when we we’re sleepless!

Love,

Ally